The Wish

It was almost early morning when Arjun looked at the time once again. He was lying in his comfortable bed but there was a sense of discomfort, some kind of an uneasiness due of which he couldn’t sleep that night. He tossed and turned after every few minutes. He was to leave home after two days. It was the call of duty, his first posting.

Arjun had got commissioned three weeks ago in the Indian Army. He had come home on leave. He wanted to join the forces ever since he was a young boy and become a great officer just like his Dad. He knew it would be difficult to match dad, but he could always try. His dad loved his country, his uniform and his men. Whenever he met Arjun, he told him about the camaraderie and brotherhood that existed among the troops. He would say, “We can kill and we can die for each other. We are brothers in arms”

Arjun knew today, his dad would be a proud man. He was going to meet him in two days. Arjun had always admired his parents. His dad for his bravery and courage and his mom for HERS!!!

“After all, every fauji wife is equally strong and passionate” he thought. 

Ma had always put a brave front whenever dad wasn’t around which was the case most of the times. She ensured that she was always there for me and my family. From attending PTM’s to handling dadi’s surgery, she had done it all. She never bothered dad. She knew he was busy doing something more important.

"I sometimes thought that I heard her sobs in the stillness of the night but the following morning she would appear all pepped up and perfectly dressed. She would play dad’s favourite songs on the cassette player and go about doing her business.", recalled Arjun

When dad had called her on a previous occasion to inform about the martyrdom of a young officer in his unit, during a counter insurgency operation, she took care of his old mother who was also our neighbour. She would take food for Gill aunty every day and ensure that she had her medicines on time. Ma was the epitome of a perfect fauji wife. 

 

                                                     image courtesy OPEN Magazine

She only broke down in front of me thrice. Once when dadi left us; age was her enemy. Second when our canine and ma’s second son Bruno was hospitalised. Ma loved Bruno so much, that he slept on her bed every single night. He was her confidant. Every night before sleeping, ma spoke to Bruno in private. She shared her fears and anguish with him for he never shared them further. Bruno loved ma too. He was very possessive for her. When Bruno died, ma was broken. Luckily dad was there with us both the times and so she left herself loose. Dad knew ma was a strong lady but then everyone needs a shoulder once in a while, he would say. There was just one more time a few years ago when I saw her cry after a phone call. 

All these memories were coming back to Arjun tonight. Ma was sleeping in the next room. He had peeped into her room many times in the night in the last few years to ensure she was fine. He walked out of his cozy blanket to see her once again. She was sleeping peacefully and he went back to his room.

"Ma has supported and encouraged me to join the forces. She has never shown me her fears all these years. I saw the pride in her eyes as she piped my ranks on my shoulders on my commissioning day.  She is ready to share her son with the nation just like she had shared her husband.", thought Arjun as he looked at her serene face in the faint light of the night lamp.

Arjun walked back to his room, trying to sleep once again. Later that evening, he told her his posting location. 

Ever since she has been praying, praying harder every evening, while lighting the lamp in front of dad’s picture on the wall of her room. She knows dad is there. It was his last posting. He had gone to the valley and never came back. Before leaving for the operation, he had called Ma to tell her that he loved her and that she should stay strong. He told her he wanted to meet me before going but he obviously couldn’t. That was the third time she cried. After that she stayed strong. She became stronger for me.

“Soldiers never go. Even their souls guard the frontiers” she told me

Ma would send me with a smile on her face for she knows dad wanted to meet me and in two days his wish would finally get fulfilled. Ma knows he is there and will take care of me. Her prayers will get answered this time. I too pray that every once in a while like earlier times dad would visit ma while I am there and lend her his shoulder when she misses me...

Perfection in Imperfection... a husband's true love for his wife...

Rahul wiped the drops of sweat from his forehead. He drank the water Dr. Rajesh offered him. Trying to regain his composure all this while, he picked the file from the doctor's table and moved through the corridor and then to the parking towards his car which he had bought last month anticipating they will need it once Prerna got pregnant.
Meanwhile, Prerna was eagerly waiting for him to come home. Both of them had been trying for a baby for over an year now. They got married four years ago. It was a love marriage. Both had tried hard to convince their families but finally had to flee and settle for a court marriage in the presence of a few dear friends. After an year or so Rahul's family accepted them, actually not them, just him for he was their only child.
Rahul and Prerna lived in their own happy nest. She always encouraged him to meet his parents. She wasn't allowed in their house but remained hopeful someday, may be the day Rahul informed them they were becoming grandparents, they would welcome her too. As it is, his mom had been raising this question for quite sometime now. "Why isn't your wife getting pregnant? Is everything OK with her?" she used to ask.
Prerna rushed to open the gate as she heard the sound of the car engine approaching their house. Rahul had kept the reports in his laptop bag and when Prerna wanted to see them, he told her to trust him. " Everything is fine. We just need to get lucky", he said. As she went in the kitchen to make the perfect cup of tea, he hid the imperfection telling file in his cupboard.
Three more months passed, Rahul's mom was getting desperate. Rahul knew he couldn't lie any more.He knew Prerna could never be pregnant. "Her uterus was not fit enough to hold a baby" ,the doc had said in simple words for Rahul to understand . One day as Rahul spoke with his mother on the phone, he told her he was undergoing treatment and wasn't fit to be a father. Prerna had overheard this conversation without Rahul noticing it. She decided to support Rahul. If Rahul hasn't told her, she would not confront him, she thought. Rahul's mom never bothered him after that call. What could she say now? It was her son after all.
Rahul and Prerna were completing five years of marriage in a week. Prerna wanted Rahul
to believe everything was normal. She had been very supportive of him all through; neither questioning him, nor inquiring about the file ever. Infact, she had brought him a perfect gift and was trying to find a place in his cupboard to surprise him when she found the file. She opened it and tears started flowing from her eyes.
When Rahul came in the evening, he saw the open file on the bed and one look at Prerna's face was all it took for him to understand what had happened. Rahul did not stop Prerna's tears, infact today he let himself loose too. Together they sat hand in hand and cried that night for their loss.
A week later Rahul brought home Sneha from Anand Ashram as an anniversary gift for Prerna. "He could be a father but Prerna deserved to be a mother too" , he had thought.